The Mystery of the Stinky Jesus

UGH! We couldn't tell where the odor was coming from. We tried everything to cover it up. Danyiel swore it was coming from inside the kids wall; I swore it was coming from under their carpet, but we both agreed something had died. We resigned to the fact we'd just have to cope for 2 or 3 weeks until the offending stench faded away.

Well those 2 or 3 weeks came and went, and the stink was still going strong. The source was a mystery until tonight: New Years Eve. It turns out the ungodly odor was coming from something quite godly—Baby Jesus! You see, on her last day of preschool, Corrin was given a potato representing Baby Jesus. Yes, a potato, complete with swaddling clothes. She insisted on sleeping with him every night leading up to Christmas. It seems one night he escaped her loving embrace and slipped between her bed and the wall to putrefy below. Mystery solved.

Uncle Billy Resurrected!

When I was a child, any refusal to eat my vegetables was met with a formidable threat: "Eat your vegetables or Uncle Billy will MAKE you eat them." (My Uncle Bill was a man of considerable size and strength, so this was not a threat to be taken lightly.) I am proud to report Uncle Billy lives again in our house. Tonight during dinner, I picked up the phone several times to call him. Despite the fact that Uncle Bill passed away two years ago, my children seem genuinely frightened a relative they have never met will lumber through the door and force-feed them string beans.

Somewhere, Uncle Bill is smiling.